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Hats & Cleets
September 15, 2008 - Summer Wallace-Minger
I still don't have a minion hat.
I'd like to have a big one, with fluffy feathers and gilt, but I guess if anyone deserves a big hat, it would be Ross or Sue. Maybe we can get Craig a minion hat--a sporty one in red, perhaps. He'd look dapper in a red hat, don't you think? I'll be fine with a glittery plastic bowler hat.
Anyway, all minion hats aside, we had an interesting weekend. Every week I pray my kids will do something funny/cute so I have something to put in my column the following week. I even tell them: "Do something darling. Mommy's job depends on it." No pressure, right?
So we did go to the Pirates' game this weekend. I feel a special connection with the Pirates players that has nothing to do with baseball. The three Mr. Nuttings, who own our papers, also have a large stake in the Pirates, so it's almost like we're coworkers. I like to root for them that way, anyway.
So we were at the game, and it was pretty awesome, mostly because of the almost-brawl. Pirate Utility Player Doug Unprounounceable Name apparently knocked the ball out of the opposing team's player's glove. The Long-Suffering One says this is some sort of cheat, but Unprounounceable Name got away with it.
Good for him, I say. I like Ty Cobb's attitude toward baseball (although not other things): It's war.
All competition is war. I want to stomp the crap out of the other guy when I'm competing with him. Cobb knew that you had to spit in the other guy's eye and take him down. It wasn't anything personal; it was just baseball.
After all, Ogden Nash said: C is for Cobb, Who grew spikes and not corn, And made all the basemen, Wish they weren"t born.
So cleats up, Dougie. Cleats up.
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This is my son with some Pirates. He loves the team, so was excited to have his picture taken with them. The guy on the right is a pitcher named Malhom, and he was really nice to my son. See how he's stretched back all funny? That's so because my son was too shy to stand right beside him. We like Paul at our house.