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Turkey Hangover

November 28, 2008 - Summer Wallace-Minger

So, it's the end of the week, and I haven't blogged yet. I'm sure if I don't, the blog police will get me.

So here I am, blogging. Nothing interesting is going on in my life right now, except for I ate too much ham and turkey yesterday.

The whole family camped out at my parents' house and ate massive, sick amounts of food. I have no idea why I do this. It's probably terrible for my health. My mom makes sweet potatoes with brown sugar, walnuts, marshmellows, pineapple and cherries. It's like a heartattack on a plate, and I'm not getting any younger.

Then my male relatives played Texas Hold 'Em while they watched football and drank beer. Am I supposed to mention that on this blog? I don't know. I'm sure that my dad wasn't the only guy in the Ohio Valley to tip a few back yesterday.

We were all glad that cousin Hunter didn't win the game, since he's obnoxious (I think it runs in the family?) anyway, and when he wins anything, he's unbearable. But that runs in the family, too.

We cheat like bandits, and we gloat. It's unattractive, but it is fun. There's no honor among thieves. For instance, when they play poker, they put the actual cash money in a lock box and lock it. I kid you not. It's a disturbing level of distrust.

Anything that needs to be counted in a game is counted as many as three times, and if someone is distracted and you snag their chips or play money, well, that's just their problem for not playing better attention, isn't it?

We've got gloating and taunting down to an art. I've made my children cry. I am forbidden to play games with them, lest I pass down our traditions to another generation.

My husband's family is much more civilized when it comes to such things, and trust me, I'd never have thought I'd be saying that about anything.


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