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About Town

January 6, 2014
By CHUCK CRONIN , Weirton Daily Times

Expand your vocabulary with these words:

Pernicious - deadly, injurious, deleterious.

Ethane - a colorless, odorless, gas.

Mot juste - the exactly right word or phase.

Peripatetic - walking about; itinerant.

Uncouth - awkward, crude, boorish.

Perfunctory - routine; done w/o care.

Testate - having made and left a legally valid will.

Balacklava - knitted helmet with opening for nose and eyes.

Gamaliel was middle name of the 29th U.S. president. Who was it? What was Thomas Jefferson's middle name? (He had none.) What was James K. Polk's middle name? (Knox.)

What is excitement? It's when they draw your drawing ticket number for $1,500 in free gasoline on Feb. 1 at the Serbian American Cultural Center. Buy your $5 ticket at the United Way office on Main Street, participating businesses or visit my office downtown at the First Choice America Federal Community Credit Union.

It was nice to chat with Brad Buchanan, the new assistant general manager at Williams Country Club. Like myself, he hails from nearby Jefferson County, Ohio - and I know many of his kinfolk.

Brad is an impressive young man who looks confident and capable in his niche at WCC as he interacts with the customers in the dining rooms of the historic stone edifice overlooking the Ohio River.

Congrats to a gentleman and great neighbor, Bill D'Alesio, 67, of Joseph Boulevard, who nears retirement after a long career in banking.

Bill spent 20 years with Henry Schmalsteig at First National Bank on Penco Road and 23 years with United Bank on Three Springs Drive.

Right now he's working short weeks, but they'll get even shorter as time goes by.

Bill served on the Chamber of Commerce Board 20 years. A good neighbor, a good citizen and a good friend!

And I have this friend who has a split personality, and both of them are obnoxious.

Then there was this guy who thought a balanced diet was simply a highball in each hand. He even had too little blood in his alcohol stream.

The six phases of a project, according to a buddy of mine named Jack: 1) enthusiasm; 2) disillusionment; 3) panic. 4) search for the guilty; 5) punishment of the innocent; and 6) praise and honors for the nonparticipants.

When he was vice president, old Calvin Coolidge was seated at a dinner party next to a lady who did not recognize him.

"What do you do for a living, Mr. Coolidge?"

"Why, I am the vice president of the United States."

She exclaimed, "oh my goodness, you must tell me about your job."

Coolidge sipped his soup and replied, "lady, I just did."

I'm at that age where everything is clicking - my elbows, knees and neck.

I liked this one:

A tourist to the Aleutian Islands off Alaska broke his glasses. The guide said, "too bad, you can't get them replaced here."

"You mean there aren't any optometrists on the island?"

"If you see one, brother, it will be an optical Aleutian."

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